The Faux Fur Coat Paradox

The following “article” is borderline on self-serving. It is merely an experiment to get me out of my writer’s block. Enjoy! (or not, I totally get it)

It’s the Saturday before Christmas and I am currently sitting in the computer lab at Armijo Public Library. I don’t mean to adhere any connotation to that sentence, it is merely describing my surroundings. There are eight kids, three teenagers, five older adults, and a couple of homeless folks (I am assuming) surrounding me. According to society, it is strange for someone like me to even be in a public library. I am a millennial in a Katya Zamolodchikova (look it up) t-shirt, I have a job, I own a laptop and a cellphone. I might as well just be at Starbucks. There are countless examples in the media about the disconnect between adults and the library. The show Modern Family comes to mind, in one of their last good seasons:

Claire:  “What do you think the public library is for?”

Haley:  “I thought that was a bathroom for homeless people.”

I am here because I wanted to change my environment. I have countless of thoughts and ideas I want to write about, however, I can’t seem to formulate them into writing. I haven’t been able to write anything of substance in about four months. I’ve unsuccessfully tried countless methods to get out of writer’s block. Said methods include, but are not limited to, taking a walk, eliminating distractions, read a book, freewriting, and listening to music. My personal favorite method to try to get the creative juices flowing (gross) is asking myself, WWCBD?

WWCBD is not just an acronym, to many, it is a way of life. What Would Carrie Bradshaw Do often helps me clear my mind in situations where I start overthinking. Just last week as my friends and my boyfriend were out partying on a carefree Sunday night, I was at home watching The Office, thinking what my night would’ve been had I gone out with them. I was looking at their Snapchat stories, checking out their new Instagram posts, everyone was having fun living their best lives while I had a Hot Cheeto stuck in my beard. I started to think, “Do they have more fun without me? Will some bearded floozy hit on my boyfriend? What if they meet a celebrity and I wasn’t there?*”

*the night before I had a dream I met Kerry Washington at my local Starbucks. It was awesome.

As I wallowed in a cloud of hopelessness and self-doubt, I put the aforementioned acronym to use. Coming to think of it, I think a lot about Carrie Bradshaw in my life. Perhaps too much given our current sociopolitical climate. As I thought about things my beloved fictional heroine would do, I concluded that getting a killer outfit will make me feel better. In true Bradshawrdian fashion, I bought myself a faux-fur coat. I imagined myself in the coat, I pictured myself in an exclusive VIP setting while my boyfriend and my friends were at home wondering how much fun I was having. Before you know it, I was asleep, having a wonderful dream about my glamorous life in the city.

(The following part is meant to be narrated by me):

carrie

As I sat in the library, I couldn’t help but wonder,

All this time I was worried about my writing when maybe I should be worrying about my surrounding.

Was it really a writer’s block or did I maybe just need a walk?

As I looked down at my black and white coat I thought, aren’t we all just a faux-fur coat?

(End of dramatic narration)

But I digress.

What started as an experiment to get me to write an exploratory piece about a current sociopolitical event, ended in me giving you a glimpse into my decision-making process. As my life becomes increasingly more hectic due to the struggles of balancing a personal life, work, and school, it is comforting to know that I can still rely on writing to give me a dose of mindless escapism (even if it has to be in a public library).

To the people who ask me about my writing and the content of my site:

I thank you for your inquiries and patience, my goal for 2019 is to manage my time and my life better. More articles coming soon,

xoxo, Juan

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s